Thanksgiving is Bullshit

Keep Fucking That Chicken: Harold Camping

"We've always said May 21 was the day, but we didn't understand altogether the spiritual meaning," he said. "The fact is there is only one kind of people who will ascend into heaven ... if God has saved them they're going to be caught up." Camping then acknowledged he was, in fact, the inspiration for Jeff Dunham's ventriloquist alter-ego, Walter.

How fucking self-centerd can we be as a species? It's bad enough thinking that God spun all of this into motion for the good of man. So he could walk around in 'god's own image' and fuck up everything God gave him. Yeah, "It took me seven days to make you all this shit, so be sure and fuck it up real good, okay? Alright, I'll be back when you're done."

You stupid fucking honkey. It won't end in October either. And if you say one goddamn thing about another miscalculation, I'm gonna dip into my 401(k), buy a plane ticket and come kick you in your 89 year-old balls. Die, fucker!

Karma is a Bitch: Bear Hunting

Well you know what they say about messing with the bull. Is this what y'all do for fun up there, bhmf?

No Shit: Afghan Prison Break Was "Inside Job"

Didn't see that one coming.

"Monday's break was the second escape at the prison in three years. In 2008, as many as 1,000 prisoners -- nearly half of them Taliban members -- escaped after militants detonated a truck bomb against the side of the prison compound."

Well, we're just gonna have to rebuild the prison, but better.

Karma Is A Bitch: Jennifer Dennison

It's probably some bad karma of my own that I enjoy reading this, but I don't give a fuck. Fuck you, bitch, and your hairsprayed, bleached blonde white trash awesomeness. Robbing from your in-laws who suffer from dementia?
"Jennifer Dennison closed at least six of her in-laws' accounts and took approximately $513,535, leaving them with nothing, the report states."

Stay Classy, San Diego: Rush Limbaugh