Saturday, October 17, 2009

Dont axe me how I found this


I cant 'splain it either except to say that I was born 1/4 white trash/redneck.

http://www.prisontalk.com/forums/index.php?s=88d5b351aa686e07392fb5b4da837f1e

This shit is Jerry Springer on the internet and fascinating. Definetly makes you not want to go to a federal pound you in the ass prison (or in SS's case, a Federale's ).

Hilarious B. Dizzle 2nd post of the night out!

"As the late, great, Col. Sanders once said' I'm too drunk to taste this chicken!'"






As I am currently in the aforementioned Kolonel Krispy's state, I decided I would share two of the dirt mcgurt's recipes for chiken. 1st one, I just did tonite.

Red Chicken Chili- (b/c I don't know what the fuck make's it white chicken chili- i forgot okay)

Saute 1/2 of a red onion in a sauce pan. Put 3 cubed boneless skinless chicken breasts in, stir until white. Add a 16 oz. can of pinto beans, a big ass can of diced tomatoes, and two big ass handfulls of jalapenos, chili seasoning mix, handful of cumin, double handful of oregano, handful of coarse/seasalt, double handfull of ground pepper, some more miscellaneous spices and simmer and stir over low heat for an hour and a half or so (or until hungry) then eat.

Jalapeno and Goatcheese stuffed chicken-

Butterfly however many chicken breasts you are cooking. Insert some solid goat cheese (mozzarella) and a big ass handful of jalepenos into the middle. Sprinkle with pepper and oregano. Close up breasts with moistened/soaked wooden toothpicks/money metal spears. Rub outside with any type of McCormick Steak/Chicken/Pork seasoning. (I use steak seasoning b/c there is not much difference between the 3.) Put on an aluminum foil covered broiler pan. Insert into pre-heated broiler. After about 5 minutes (a canned beer/cigarettes worth of time) flip over and repeat after 5 minutes. Then, apply some brown/stone-ground mustard to chicken and let carmelize/glaze over for a few minutes, then repeat on the other side. Next, crack a few beers and enjoy.


P.S. I know this is not a recipe for raw ass red meat, but every ninja jackal knows how to make that, so I thought I would throw out some recipes for some lesser ass meat to make it less pussy.

P.P.S. Mariah Carey is probably the only the only person on earth that I would toss her salad. Holler!

Friday, October 16, 2009

Ball Deep: Wizard Imposter?

Ball DEEP said...

pssst Head. I am two beers away from wizard status in the first pic.

Not bloody likely:














AND his staff is standing up more straight than he is.

So the question is: Was Ball Deep declared a Wizard two beers after the picture when clearly he was not there yet? Did he slouch or hold his staff on his toe to attain wizard status so he could crawl off to bed at 7:30 PM??

Brazen accusations, I know. But stand by until November 14th, when we'll find out if Ball Deep is a Wizard for real.

I'll see your reminder....and raise you!

First things first, press play.



And now let the ass kicking wash over you....












I think I have to send you a reminder. Here it is!

First things first, press play.



And now let the ass kicking wash over you....





































































-No Subject-

'nuff said.

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Last One For Now...

I couldn't resist, but does anybody else find it ironic that the kid they thought flew away in a mylar ufo today was named Falcon?

Oh yeah, and his dad's a weather chaser and makes them all sleep fully clothed in the case of a "weather event".

This Blew My Feeble Mind

This midget's nine years old. I can only recall one similar feat of athletic prowess that involves ScarShoulders, myself and a rim at Bushy Park Elementary.

Fuck the Phillies: Moreover Fuck Face Hair in Baseball

I'm currently watching the Dodgers/Phillies game (note that I list the Dodgers first, intentional, and only after watching the Caps crush the high-scoring San Jose Sharks 4-0), and Phillies just hit a 3-run homer. Between saying fuck my baseball life and pounding a glass of Carlos Rossi "piason" (is that an Italian dig?) I caught glimpse of this historically weak suck-ass's facial hair.



While this isn't a new observation, it just further served my theory that baseball players have the worst facial hair ever.

Not that the NBA isn't without merit...


But baseball's takes the cake.

What is it about baseball that encourages a new level of lameness? Is it the Skoal? Rednecks with no idea what the fuck it is to be a man?
What do you think? Maybe I just fucking hate the Phillies.

PS Manny Ramirez just hit a 2-run homer.

Rain Sucks

 

Rain sucks and it's taking a toll on ol' Boogers. On top of it all, my walk/train to work today was loud as fuck. 
I'm so fucking pumped up, because my boy, T-Large done invited me to go camping somewhere in the Virginia wilderness and get awesome(there's already talk of achieving Wizard status), firing weaponry(which BMR doesn't really give a shit about, but pretty jackal behavior as far as the jackal spectrum is concerned) and general getting back to being jackal, despite the nation's capital attempting to clone my jackal ass.


Hope she warms you up on this shitty, shitty day.