Friday Hottie: Megan Fox...Again

Seriously is there anyone hotter?

Friday Hottie: Flied Lice Edition

Kelly Hu is pretty awesome.

JOTD: Ozzie Fuckin' Newsome

"But for those who study the draft, the Ravens are considered almost unmatched because of their acumen in the middle rounds, where the remaining players have greater shortcomings. Football Outsiders analyzed the Ravens’ draft picks from 2001 through 2007 to determine the value of each pick, based on games started, compared with players at the same position chosen within 10 spots by other teams. During that time, the Ravens’ picks had the best average value."

Ba-leeve it.

Go to Fucking Asleep

Canadiens may want to review this

I'm Just Sayin': Dudes With Chicks' Names

I don't know about the rest of you jackals, but that jackal donning a #8 jersey for the Caps isn't afraid of a goalie with a chick's name. While it wasn't immediate ScarShoulderdamus material, it looks like ol' SS wasn't too far off, although he may be completely losing his shit at work this week. Dude went OBD on a email chain 'Reply All', accusing two jackals and one wayward jackal relative of incestual gay sex acts. The original Jackals' Den is a tough destination for a midweek awesome fest, I'm just sayin'.

How to tell you are the boss

You know when you know you have made it? You have reached the pinnacle of all things?
(No, not buying that "I am #1 hat") is when you are in your own office and you can just FART the shit out of your own office and people come and have to smell your feces entering their nostrils and SMILE....

YES BITCH SMILE AND SMELL MY SHIT!

Jackal's Day In Court: Eleven Months Later

Almost a year later and DC Superior Court finally ruled that the security deposit plus interests and court costs are due to Mr. McRib, attorney at law. We learned two things here, kids:

1) If you're renovating and renting without regard for permits, licenses and general building code, return your tenant's security deposit

2) If you're taking an old landlord to court, make sure said landlord HAS money

While there was a moral victory to be had, that shit don't pay bills. Don't sleep.

Do Ya' Thing, NJ: Sorry, BD2, This One Was Wayyyy Too Good. Where's Clonelle?

And where is the animated Jessica Alba we were promised? Sorry, BD2, I'm really close to being done with ripping on New Jersey headlines, but this might be the best one yet.

GCOTD: Goldman Sachs

Reap what you sow bitch!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

Go the fuck asleep Goldman Sachs. Goldman gold is going down. Fuck you very much.

JOTD: Boogers

BMR is rallying his entire office for a lunch time game of Kubb. It could go one of two ways, he could be viewed as a total slacker for wanting to play games instead of work or he could be commended for uniting co-workers and uplifting morale. Details to follow.