Baltimore? On the map?

That's twice Bmore gets the national spotlight. That comeback win from being down 10-1 was sweet, but I wish it was against the Stankees. Although, the Sawx are the better team right now. Underdogs are what Baltimore does best. Pittsburgh, I hope you had a nice hockey season, skrimps 'bout to get put asleep!

Blowing Off Steam Alert!

From yesterday's Associated Press interview with Mark Sanford, the embattled and philandering governor (at least for now) of South Carolina:

Sanford, at times crying and unabashedly emotional, acknowledged in the AP interview that he had casual encounters with other women while he was married but before he met Chapur. They took place during trips outside the country to "blow off steam" with male friends.

"What I would say is that I've never had sex with another woman. Have I done stupid? I have. You know you meet someone. You dance with them. You go to a place where you probably shouldn't have gone," Sanford said, declining to discuss details. But he said those encounters were nothing like his relationship with Chapur.

"If you're a married guy at the end of the day you shouldn't be dancing with somebody else. So anyway, without wandering into that field we'll just say that I let my guard down in all senses of the word without ever crossing the line that I crossed with this situation."

Emphasis mine. Does anyone else see where I'm going with this? Was Steven on these trips?

Greatest Sports Headline Ever: "Believe it: Orioles rally from 10-1 deficit, win"

"Believe it: Orioles rally from 10-1 deficit, win

Trailing Red Sox by nine runs in seventh inning, O's post back-to-back five-run innings, rally to win in biggest comeback in franchise history"

Sorry I missed it, sounds like it was an amazing game.

If only it mattered...

Jackals BBQ

Dust off your dungaroos and put on your super slacks your boy ScarShoulders is throwing another 3rd of July BBQ.

My place on Friday. Come over anytime after 2pm. I'll provide the meat for grilling.

Bring beer and sides. Prepare to get awesome.

Ball D lets try and keep the tater tot talk to a minimum and all of my patio furniture in my yard this year....

UNF this motherfucker!

Only this, intergalactic epicenter of douchebaggery would have the sac to shit on a franchise as glorious as the Transformers. To mar and maul it's illustrious heritage with a robot that speaks ebonics, or a main character as gay clonable as Shya Labeouf or however you spell is whack ass french name. Yes, france, I stopped capitalizing the eff in your stupid fuckin' country's name, you can go back to your shitty mustache, clone beret and 'haw haw haw's. I'm pretty fuckin' pissed this DB is making a second pass at the jackal motherfuckers known as Transformers and more pissed it's not tanking at the box office. Fuck you, Michael Bay, go read scripts about your future assignment to desecrate, of all things, board games! Although, whoever brought Megan Fox into the mix, that fuckin' jackal needs his due!

P.S. cqq99, who the fuck are you? Are you so spineless as to meander through the Jackals Den, without saying a word? Not contributing is one thing, but your name suggests nothing funny, nor anything jackal. Instead it consists of three letters and two numbers. Obviously, I have some issues with aggravation, but there are so many things about your appearance in the contributors column that incite my inner Tico. You're Steven, aren't you? SS, I thought we were going to do away with "contributors" that suck ass. From this day forward, I will refer to their kind as CTSA's. Yes, Babyface, that's another acronym, in case you're counting.

WTF?????

What the hell is wrong with this country? This is a real product. Note the different options available, happy or determined Obama. I saw this on MY9 during the Jail program. If you haven't seen it...you are really missing "OOUUTTT"

GCOTD

So I'm going to Wales for a wedding this weekend? I don't understand this place. Are they a country, are they a state. I'll tell you what their not, Jackals. Who heard about that revolution they had to become their own country? Uhhh, yeah. Scotland, yeah they got that shit down. Been fightin for a thousand years. Ireland, been there, done that. Freedom....check. Wales, what the fuck is wrong with you? You like being England's bitch or something?

I am accepting all suggestions to UNF this bitch ass country in any way possible.

No offer will be turned down!

GCOTD: Me

I realize I am placing myself in bad company here, but let's be honest for a moment. For at least the next 3 weeks going to be a Gay Clone because the Tour de France is starting which means that I will be watching Vs. (known for lame as programming such as MMA, and well that's it MMA) for a minimum of a few hours a day to watch dudes in France sweating it out in Spandex. I'm just sayin'.

America, FUCK YEAH!!

78-0

Suck on that France. Bitches. Guess our soccer team doesn't look that shitty after all compared to the rest of the worlds football teams.

America. Fuck Yeah. Baleeve it.

I'm Back

It's been 4 days. Too long. Work holding me down. Kansas hold me down. Everyone's falling off. No Gay Clones of the day. No signs of life from Voicemail. But leave it to SS to get back on his grind and fill you in on the realness bright and early on Tuesday morning, midwest recap style.

Annoyance #1. Lightning at the airport. They make an announcement that we will be delayed. We haven't boarded yet. Then they board us 2 minutes later.. Get on the plane and they make an announcement that the plane needs to be fueled up and none of our luggage is on it and there is still lightning and we'll be delayed a bit. 90 minutes later we take off. Note to all airlines. If you ever put me on a plane that has no fuel or luggage again I will kill you.

Annoyance #2. Get our rental car and go to drive out of the lot and the receipt doesn't match the car. We got it out of spot 300 like we were supposed to. Had to go back and get it squared away. Annoying as fuck.

Annoyance #3. We are now driving around fucking Kansas.

And then things took a turn for the awesome. Get to the hotel a bit after midnight Kansas time. Greeted with scotch. Drink scotch. Convince Heather it's an awesome idea for me to go to Atlantic City the night before the family trip to Greece. Kick ass in some Wii bowling. Get awesome until 4am.

Day 2. Wake up and hit the breakfast and then the pool. You can add Heathers grandmother, cousins, aunts and uncles to the list of people who respect my gangsta in the form of the ScarShoulders. Off to lunch. Jack Stack BBQ. Hot damn that shit was good. I got some sort of sampler and the beef rib was the size of my fist and unbelievably tender and delicious. The baby backs were good too as were the burnt ends to a lesser degree and the beans which has chicken AND beef in them were out of this world. Then the wedding, and getting awesome until 4am again.

This story serves as a lesson to all of you. I had a great time in Kansas, got awesome both nights, won 5 games of Wii bowling (which I had never played before, I'm a fuckin bowling natural) green lighted an AC trip, had some awesome BBQ, bonded with Heathers family, and basically Jackaled it up 24 7. When you're given Lemons (Kansas) make Lemonade (UNF everywhere).

Balee dat.