I'm Back

It's been 4 days. Too long. Work holding me down. Kansas hold me down. Everyone's falling off. No Gay Clones of the day. No signs of life from Voicemail. But leave it to SS to get back on his grind and fill you in on the realness bright and early on Tuesday morning, midwest recap style.

Annoyance #1. Lightning at the airport. They make an announcement that we will be delayed. We haven't boarded yet. Then they board us 2 minutes later.. Get on the plane and they make an announcement that the plane needs to be fueled up and none of our luggage is on it and there is still lightning and we'll be delayed a bit. 90 minutes later we take off. Note to all airlines. If you ever put me on a plane that has no fuel or luggage again I will kill you.

Annoyance #2. Get our rental car and go to drive out of the lot and the receipt doesn't match the car. We got it out of spot 300 like we were supposed to. Had to go back and get it squared away. Annoying as fuck.

Annoyance #3. We are now driving around fucking Kansas.

And then things took a turn for the awesome. Get to the hotel a bit after midnight Kansas time. Greeted with scotch. Drink scotch. Convince Heather it's an awesome idea for me to go to Atlantic City the night before the family trip to Greece. Kick ass in some Wii bowling. Get awesome until 4am.

Day 2. Wake up and hit the breakfast and then the pool. You can add Heathers grandmother, cousins, aunts and uncles to the list of people who respect my gangsta in the form of the ScarShoulders. Off to lunch. Jack Stack BBQ. Hot damn that shit was good. I got some sort of sampler and the beef rib was the size of my fist and unbelievably tender and delicious. The baby backs were good too as were the burnt ends to a lesser degree and the beans which has chicken AND beef in them were out of this world. Then the wedding, and getting awesome until 4am again.

This story serves as a lesson to all of you. I had a great time in Kansas, got awesome both nights, won 5 games of Wii bowling (which I had never played before, I'm a fuckin bowling natural) green lighted an AC trip, had some awesome BBQ, bonded with Heathers family, and basically Jackaled it up 24 7. When you're given Lemons (Kansas) make Lemonade (UNF everywhere).

Balee dat.