Good god, jesus titty-fucking, sweet merciless judah of astronomic proportions. Popular music is so fucking fucked right now, it makes the Republican party look like it has its shit together. On the slate yesterday was a stacked television line-up that featured the Capitals trying to win ten straight, the Terps going to South Cakalacky, attempting to win their fifth straight. The night cap was underdog UVA heading to Chapel Hill to kick Roy Williams in the nuts and the Pro Bowl was stacked with Dirty Birds, but instead SS and BMR watched, The Grammy's? I know marriage lands you in favorable tax situations, two incomes beat one, driving her four wheel drive during the occasional snow is pretty clutch, but this?
On CBS though, around 8pm, shit started getting way too real. Pop music is fucked.
Beyonce did kind of slut it up, which I guess is overdue. This photo is cool, because you can pretend like she's "flying solo", if you know what I'm sayin'...
Lady Gaga successfully took the Grammy's hostage and, as Mrs. SS pointed out, forced every artist, besides the country genre, to hire dozens of dancers and extras, some in riot gear, others dressed up like a Voltron boom box or a bad guy from Power Rangers, but the one guy from the Black Eyed Peas had a rubber mask that made him look like 'The Gimp' from Pulp Fiction.
You know BMR's disclaimers are fuckin' legit. This clip of the Black Eyed Peas is not for the faint at heart. There is so much about the Black Eyed Peas that sucks, I can't begin to discuss it in this post. Stay tuned for GCOTD: Black Eyed Peas, coming soon, my team of researchers is working around the clock to bring that post to you.
SS did well and called the only artist that didn't completely suck balls. If you make it to the end of this Zac Brown tune, the "America, America" at the beginning is the worst part, but you'll actually see a Grammy nominee/winner who plays an instrument, realizes people are dying in Iraq and Afghanistan and gives them DAP, I'm guessing who also writes songs(good songs, Taylor Swift, you fucking cunt!) and there's a wicked flatpick guitar solo at the 4:40 mark if you last that long.
It's true, around 8:05pm Mrs SS dropped the gauntlet on the dudefest BMR and I were having in my living room and forcefully threw on the Grammys. She likes these crappy awards shows, it's in her DNA, she can't be blamed. It wouldn't have happened if other Jackals who said they were coming over had actually come over but they didn't and it did and it was good for laughs but bad for Jackaling it up. The only real shock of the evening is that BMR stayed until damn near 10pm watching it... And I give props where props are due, Pink is on some crazy acrobatic cirque de soleil 95% nude shit. Her music still sucks, although I think she can sing a bit, but at least she is risking her life doing it.
ReplyDeleteWhile I appreciate the fact that you did some GCOTD homework, this topic of BEPs being the worst travesty ever has been covered:
ReplyDeleteBlack Eyed Peas suck cat feces through a straw.
In regards to watching this over the ProBowl can't really blame you there. They both suck equally and at least you can witness the train wreck that is the music business unfold first hand.
Next time you are in an environment that is watching such garbage I suggest going to the door and exiting without any explanation as soon as humanly possible.
PS Pink is a dude.
I wasn't trying to sling blame around like a spinning pink pissing on the confused masses, I was just marveling at how the general public has no fucking clue what good music is. There is no fucking way the Pro Bowl sucks this bad
ReplyDelete