Land of the Free

Whoever told you that is your enemy.

"As you must know, Lancer has made some inquiries regarding our activities, which we cannot allow. Please submit your views no later than October. Your action to this matter is critical to the continuance of the group."

KFTC: OBD

Hey, OBD, why couldn't your vaunted, all-knowing Bush administration pull this one off? Seems funny to me how the 15-year low was achieved in 2009, after BHO got to work. Skrimp. Actually, you really have to give credit to Ol' Skull & Bones. After all, the economy being in the toilet was likely the number one contributor. If we could convince India and China to eat each other and take piggy-back rides to work, we might be in good shape.

If You Gotta Go...

So the story behind that really cheesey, kind of jackal photo is I googled this poor bastard's name and got a jackal-related(albeit Stargate-esque) image like six hits down the list.

Just to think though, all that bullshit over a woman. I know a lot of them seem like they're worth it, but crocodiles?

You Don't Say...

I'm kind of tired of ninjas waiting a decade to start talking about shit.

Did you digest that? How's this for holy shit?

Gay Clone Industry: Douchebag Manufacture

If I had known these fuckers were right in my back yard, I would have gotten awesome and UNF'd that ass. I do want to bury my turtle in Michelle Bachmann's mud, though...

Life of a Jackal- Excerpts from the Fringe of O.B.D.'s Life

Yo! Finally off work early, so checking in with some funnies, 4 real. Havent had time to update on the hilarity of my life recently.

So, I was at a superbowl party with the chick I was seeing, at her sisters place. All their family was there, like 10 people. All liberal/tree-hugger types, and they are talking about b.s. while I am trying to watch the freakin game and get my swurve on. So, as I wander up from the tv room where the men are; in search of more beers, I get accosted by the women, about something. They are talking about something that I clearly dont remember or cared to hear at the time right- So I decided to interrupt , and tell them about my latest re-discovered pasttime- littering! (SS I know you feel me!) I go off for approx. 4 minutes on the joys of throwing soda bottles and random food trash out my truck window while I am driving, and the laughter and joy it brings me.

Then I realize everybody is staring @ me like I'm a Nazi or something. Squares= Freaked Out. There was some nervous laughter from everybody else, as if I might be joking, and my chick made some dumb joke about punching me if she saw me do that, and I said something about her not being able to see that happen if a milkshake hits her windshield while shes driving, and then the awkwardness increased, and nobody was real enough to say anything about this, and then I said excuse me, opened the fridge, got two beers out (pretending one was for someone else; it wasn't) and walked past the still silent women to watch the rest of the superbowl.

I laughed about this off and on for approximately that day until present, off and on.

Also, advice to you single (and newly single) fellas- No matter how well you mean it, telling a chick she has nice "meat curtains" is almost universally NOT accepted as a compliment by the gentler sex. Go'an an ax me how I know that.


Bdizzle out.

Eye for an eye right???

This one's for you Boogers. I thought your laser was for shooting large objects i.e. planes boats etc etc. This laser is for blinding civilians and also works against pirates. Man these pirates got people sweating. Non lethal right? Well guess so but you might be blind for a few days.

But look you fucking retards, the pirates are ready for this one. Know what that patch over there eye is for? Well its there back up eye and they can see through the patch. Blind 'em in one eye, they flip the patch off and put a sword through your gut. Pirates are smart like that, probably do drugs too.

Jackal Coping Mechanisms: Sex and Ganja

Could Detroit go from this


to this?

Keeping It Jackal: Barack Obama

"I said, 'You want to repeal health care? Go at it. We'll have that debate. You're not going to be able to do that by nickel-and-diming me in the budget. You think we're stupid?'"

Mr. Obama said he told House Speaker John Boehner and members of his staff that he'd spent a year and a half getting the sweeping health care legislation passed -- paying "significant political costs" along the way -- and wouldn't let them undo it in a six-month spending bill.

Friday Hottie: Kelly Monaco