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Happy Birthday Shote Sleeves!

Your present is an embarrassing alumnus:



Oh, and some more bad news about Mr. Newton.* Have a great day!

*For the record, (1) I think he's amazing and really hope he can keep playing this season and (2) I sort of think college players should be paid in some way for the revenue they generate for their schools and (3) I'm not sure why we care about his academics at his previous school except as part of a slander campaign to convince the public that athletes are dirty so that ADs can avoid what I said in (2).

KFTC: Jackals Disguised As Philanthropists

Yo, to you jackals exploiting disease to improve your chances of 'Babyface-esque' dick wetness, KFTC. I don't appreciate it in the slightest. Boogers is boycotting all things 'Movember'*.



* All things ' Movember' that put other jackals' "asscapades" disproportionately ahead of his own.

Goddamnit...

No Way!: BaltimoreRavens.com Be Jockin' BMR's Styles

Virginia Tech 28, Georgia Tech 21

Well, it was painful almost from start to finish - a friend who went to the game with me likened it to a bout where one boxer was drunk and the other's left arm stopped working in the 5th round - but we got the win and that's all that matters. Random thoughts:

• David Wilson is fast. Though I have to say I can't remember another time that I watched a special teams touchdown with my hands in my pockets. From my angle I could see what looked like a huge hole as soon as he caught the kickoff and thought, "I'm pretty sure he's going to score." And he did.
  
• We've now fallen behind 17-0, 10-0, 17-0, and 14-0 in four games this year and come back to take the lead in all four of those games (and win all but the Boise State game). At some point this is going to have to stop or it's going to cost us a game we need to win (I'm guessing the ACC Championship).
  
• Similarly, the offense is going to need to be better than this. It would have been nice for the D to perform better, but really they were good enough to win. The only reason the game was close was because the offense bogged down for more than two quarters against a defense that NC State shredded for 45 points.
  
• After being a real weapon four weeks in a row, wow was Jayron Hosley terrible on punt returns tonight.
• It's a big bummer that Nesbitt got hurt and is now out for the year - it's a crappy way to win a game and a crappy way for a good player to end his career (though I guess he could be back for their bowl game).
  

So are the Terps going to meet us in Charlotte for the ACC Championship?

Friday Hottie: Catrinel Menghia

Lynx of the Day: Honey

http://www.weather.com/outlook/videos/dog-catches-fish-in-flood-18694#18694

I'd like to think my dog is this cool.

KFTC: McRib

"Hey, McRib. Thanks for basically keeping the Den entertaining for the past six months. How can we ever repay you? By the way, make sure you keep us up to date on everything that's funny, okay? I don't care if you send 'Autotune the News' videos out via Gmail, post them on the Den also. Okay? And don't recognize any truths about the dangers of alcohol, keep grazing like a sheep and don't question status quo. I'm going to claim you're a clone, even though you post high resolution photographs of spectacularly beautiful women once a week for my enjoyment. After two years of doing this, I'll still sign in improperly and comment, okay? In general, fuck you, stop making our blog great and die."

Jackal Invention: Invisibility Cloak

Way to keep your eyes on the prize, Scottish scientists. My main ninjas at Nanocomp Technologies got bullet-proof on lock down, so now we just need to perfect the jet pack and we'll be straight.