Jack Del Rio, Catchy name, snazzy threads.

As an obligatory post, for the gear up to the best weekend of the year, a tribute to a man with style.














But a middling to mediocre team.

The Naga (Bhut) Jolokia Pepper

I have eaten a pussy size piece of a habanero pepper- and it instantly made me break out with the flop sweats and my tongue went numb instantly. The habanero avgs 200,000-300,000 Scoville units. This bitch puts that to shame, with a new, 2007 Guinness World record for hottest chili pepper. It avgs around 1,000,000 Scoville units of capscaisin. By comparison - Tobasco sauce is around 2500-5000 Scoville units.

What the fuck did I do? I cant get this fucking hyperlink off here.

Anyways, I have acquired 3 of these, they are currently in cold storage in my fridge. I get freaked out, and just a little bit excited, looking at them. Anybody want to get drunk with me, and throw one in a pot of chili?



I am terrified of having these in the house, and don't know what to do with them. Should I just jackal up and house 1, or feed some to unsuspecting people at parties later? Maybe both. I will follow up if I grow some baby nuts and deal with these.

GCOTD: Any Pittsburgh Steeler, but How About This One in Particular?

Troy is about the gayest fuckin' name I've ever heard. This commercial had better pay well. If cutting your hair is against your religion, you might be GAF.

Jackal Update: ACC Sucks at Football

Football in the ACC is boring. I went to a tiny private college that could never hope to put a football team on the field and there's something to be said about blind faith in your school. I love ACC Basketball. It's the shit. Don't get me wrong. Greivis, you're my fuckin' boy, I hope I spelled your name right. But, Kenny Tate, can you show us something against a school whose logo is this gay?

 

Scar Shoulders Presents: Know Your Terps, Kenny Tate Edition

You see that ice cold stare? The focus? Meet red shirt sophmore coverted wide receiver 6 foot 4 two hundred and fifty pounds strong safety Kenny Tate.

This guy will be all over the field tonight. My prediction is a sack and an INT, and if we're lucky... he'll make Javid Best spill his lunch all over the field... again.

Go Terps!

"Yeah, you make good comments...but they typically give those jobs to, you know, ex-ballplayers and...professional broadcasters"

This is funny as hell:

"tanya snyder's vajayjay is fourteen degrees celsius "

as are many of the other one's you have added as labels. Keep 'em comin' Boog.

Dan Snyder Go Asleep: Response

Boog, I can't argue there. Dan Snyder...eat a fatty. He has singlehandedly screwed up one of the most storied franchises in the league. Still got love for my Redskins though. Maybe he will die and a new owner will come along and suck a percentage less than he. One can only hope.

Let's get back to the good 'ol days. Clinton Portis, shut up and beat Riggins record, Hayneworth, break Eli Manning in two, Zorn, Hip hip..Super Bowl, come on were ready. 18 years is long enough to wait. Get your shit together and win. Split the division rival games, beat AFC West, Beat NFC South 10-6 playoffs... Balleeeevvvee it.
As far as the ticket holders, I dont feel bad for them at all. Season tickets are damn expensive and a luxury. I had them for one year and it was tough. Payment plans to help you stay a season ticket holder is the most absurd thing I have ever heard. Get the fuck out if you can't pay. Maybe if there werent so many assholes drawing down their home equity and credit cards to get season tickets, prices would go down and availability would go up. A brotha would like to watch the game without needing binocks and shit.

This is the same reason our houses are worth a third of what they used to be and you can barely afford to get a new pair of sneaks. This mostly credit driven society is on the way out. Try and get a loan, I dare you. Unless you have the money already, you ain't getting it. Unless you pay through the nose through paying high as hell interest and have really good credit. Just pay straight cash for shit. Or take smart loans when you NEED them. If you don't have money, you can't drive a BMW and have a Blackberry. Jackals gotta keep that shit on lock because it is too easy to fall into that trap. I am speaking from experience. I have been living champangne lifestyle on a lite beer budget for a minute. No mas.

Not to mention that the NFL has been getting fat off us for our whole lives. They should have to deal with the pains of recession too. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go to nfl.com and purchase some team licensed apparel at astronomical prices and then go read about my team on yahoo.com and see an ad for Coors light. Then I'll go buy some Coors light after work to forget about all of this negative shit. (this is exactly what is going to happen.)

Jackal Gone Astray: Jim Breuer

This jackal lost his goddamn way. His life GPS was set on suck. Not sure if you guys ever watched Pulp Comics on Comedy Central, but this analogy to drinking is great. I'm gonna have a beer or two this weekend in the hope that Jim Breuer gets some work that doesn't suck.

Douchebag of the Day: Dan Snyder

There's a solid 'Skins constituency in the Den, so I'll keep this brief. However, this story is enough to piss me right the fuck off. I grew up with the 'Skins. I want them to go back to the glory days. His wife looks like an icy bitch. I'm JUST SAYING!

JOTD: This guy

I want to invite this guy to Mancation '10 when he gets out on bond. I'm just hoping my jackalism doesn't lead him to be 'greatly perturbed', but I'm willing to gamble four or five slaps. Ball Deep, forgive me for overposting, but you know how much I hate your excessive youtube shuttling. Plus, this ties in pretty nice with your 'WalMart is the Shit' post. Next time you're there, keep your baby quiet, okay? The best part of this story? 'Though the child "started crying and screaming" after being struck, Stephens told Matthews, "See, I told you I would shut her up."'