CTB Show 497: Edgar Allan Poe Walks Among Us
5 days ago
Sunday, April 22, 2012
Fuck friends that live far away
This is more a J2J call out than anything. Where are all my homies? I am almost about to buy a big ass sailboat for like 3gs. I can keep that shit at the marina in my neighborhood. No trailer, no storage fees except reg. marina ones. Damn, I need to get some local middle liver homeschools. I guess I have to start hanging out at the local marina bars again. Boats are awesome, but they need friends to keep the fun afloat. Does anybody live anywhere remotely close to me that likes drinking, drinking on a boat, fishing, fishing and drinking, and or fishing and drinking while on a boat? If not, you are a gay homosexual, and need to stick your arm in a woodchipper.
I need to buy this, but common sense is kicking my ass right now.
Why all the hate for upstate? Dont be skeered.
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Yo, I like some fishin', brah. I don't like boat fuel or how much it costs. I just don't really give a shit about boats. I will come up and drink on yours though.
ReplyDeleteYeah, thats expected. I kind of want more of a boat buying partner though. That way, I will only feel half as stupid for buying it. Plus its a sailboat, it doesnt need gas. You should buy it with me, and we can wear sweet admirals uniforms and call each other commodore and shit. It will almost certainly get you a job and laid, possibly at the same time.
ReplyDeleteThere's no way, man. "Boat-buying partner" sounds pretty clone. I'm not sure I want any part of it. Sail boats are pretty gay and they still require boat fuel(Psst...sometimes wind stops). KFTC, though. I do want to drink on it, but considering I'm about to pay May rent with a down payment I was reserving for a new car, I'm probably not the best one to "invest". Speaking of which, have you bothered to calculate "Top 10 Worst Ways to Spend/Invest Money"? I'm pretty sure boat-buying is up there.
ReplyDeleteCommodore Boogers says, "no thanks, brah!" LOL!!! Now this is funny, but his comments that follow are a little askew.
ReplyDelete1st: sailboats are not gay. Sailboats are for people who actually "get" what boating and being on the water is all about. Sailboats are for people with skills. Motorboats are for petro-man or, in other words, people who couldn't stay afloat and couldn't or wouldn't be boating if not for the fact that any idiot third grader can captain a powerboat given the fact that they can manage the unloading of the thing at the boat ramp. The boat ramp is the hardest part of powerboating, fuck I gotta back my Ford F450 with the trailer on it in a straight line? Fucking retards!!!
2nd: Sailboats do not require fuel. Fuel is not a necessity, but a luxury. There are no requirements for luxuries. Oxygen is a necessity. We mammals like to breathe O2, but moving oxygen is a luxury. Wind is a luxury. A cool breeze the highest of that fine category. When the wind stops, you best get fucking paddling. B-Dog knows what's up. Piney run lake. Gots our paddle on. Boat sprung a leak. Gots our paddle on faster.
Sorry Boog's, I'll quit ragging on ya. Your damn right that boats are not good investments but neither are half of the other things people be buying to have a good time with either.
Haha, you said 'neither' and 'either' in one sentence. I tried to sail a dingy once and I failed miserably, so maybe it's a matter of sailboat intimidation. Either/neither way, I am not the co-investor RTB is seeking. Is that more/less clear? P.S. I start a new job on Monday after five weeks on the lamb. Booyakasha!
ReplyDeleteLoud and clear commodore, loud and clear. I'd stay away from sailboat investments myself, if I lived on the right coast. I think some sort of armored 4x4 vehicle with a years worth of camping supplies and a few good maps would be a better way to spend your money.
ReplyDeleteAs for the dingy incident. You tried once eh? Wow, way to stick at it. How many times did you try to learn to ride a bike before you mastered that feat? One try at sailing? That is like saying, well I tried to fly once but failed so all planes are gay. Nice use of logic Einstein.
Glad to hear about the job. I didn't know Burger King was hiring! Ah ha ha ha, tell us some details shit brains. Are you a centerfold photographer for Maxim or washing dishes at the local burger joint?
J2J Callout, RTB : don't let common sense kick your ass. And I know how much money you make an hour. Splitting costs on a $3,000 boat, c'mon man! I could understand for a $30,000 boat but 3 G's is chump change ninja!
ReplyDeleteI dunno, if I were you I'd buy a motorcycle. Even Lucas' sorry ass has somehow managed to get two wheels a'runnin. You could do that for less than the cost of the boat and save money on your ride to work and look cool at the same time. And the Christ Punchers always was the best idea you ever had.......and when I come home to visit I'd be obliged to steal someone's motorcycle and ride with you outlaws.
Since my celebratory comment about getting a gig, it got pushed back two weeks. Flying is kind of gay now that you mention it.
ReplyDeleteThat sounds like a sweet gig. You get a two week vacation before you even start work.
ReplyDelete